christmas came early.

so did Hanukkah for that matter. dradles and snowmen all in one morning once i checked my messages. 

why?

(photoshopped for effect)

because ... well ... i'm not really proud of violence in any way, shape or form but ... i gotta tell you:  when someone has it coming because of numerous things ... they have it coming.  this on the heels of word that his orange-ness has yet another blog deal which is said to be homogenized. 

every guy i know -- okay there's one who probably hasn't -- has been punched.  i got punched over a wine cooler.  whatever.  stupid.

but when you "out" people with clearly private photos, continually use paparazzi photos clearly meant to hurt someone's feelings, um, and represent yourself as a "real media outlet" ... you probably deserve the punches.  so ... he calls canadian 411 ... which i'm sure is probably faster in mexico ... and is told no one was available to respond.

what does he do next?  he fucking twitters about it? 

whilst i'm happy that many of you have no idea who this piece of shit is ... others know that i'm not a fan.  he's got a such a false sense of entitlement it's nauseating.  listening to him is just as naseating.

watching photographers laugh at him on a red carpet is, however, a nice treat.

anyway ... after the police told him "they have real crimes going on" he tweets.  this donut-eating-cow's primary audience is 26 year old females in either kansas or canada.  both i think.  even though they have no connection to entertainment besides their lust for a new episode of john and kate plus eight and an unhealthy obsession with fucking vampires and the horribly untalented jonas-fucking-brothers ... they feel a connection through their long-lost sister, old orange mean fatty.

has kristen bell, who is beyond sweet, done anything mean to you, you fucking piece of shit?

because of his tremendous self-hate he draws penises on people, gives them photoshopped shit piles beneath them, faux-cocaine dots on their noses ... he sits around in his cute little bathrobe and cackles whilst drawing this shit.

his said audience eats it up and leaves hundreds of comments a day.

those 26 year olds are really what's wrong with the world, though.  they empower that piece of shit.

i remember back in the day when i said "why the fuck do you steal photos?  your site wouldn't be shit without photos.  no one would read even a sentence of your site without our exclusive photos." 

he's sneer back "everyone does it; why am i any different?  i'm just blogging."

he knew that was as much of a lie as what he accuses will.i.am. of doing on his own blog.

not only that ... but ... when is being gay a bad thing?  i love my gay friends.  whenever i've said "you're so gay" it's never been in a derogatory context.  i've had gay friends say to me "you're so gay."  what-the-fuck-ever.

i gotta tell you, though, i've never ever heard someone who's gay say "you're a faggot" in a mean hateful way.  the way his orangeness said that about will.i.am.  if you champion yourself for equal rights and pick on beauty queens for their heart-felt views, aren't you a bit of a fucking hypocrite?

aren't you?

i've never seen anyone refer to someone as what he said in such a self-hating mean way.  you can see that he really does hate himself for being something he's not quite comfortable with being.  is that perhaps why he always wants to out people?  perhaps that's why he tries and make young girls feel bad about themselves.

it's fucking sad.

i've pretty much gotten over the fact he used to steal so much of my work.  what's funny is that he knows i can't stand him.  he's asked certain publicists to not use me.  they still did, though.  it's sad to me that other shooters who've had their work ripped for totally commercial purposes and ran and hosted his server in eastern europe ... will still shoot when they know he's the end-client.  where are your principals?  i wouldn't shoot this piece of shit if you paid me 10 day rates.

okay ... i remember about a year and a half ago a client told me to shoot him and i laughed.  he asked "where are the photos of perez?" which i shot back "i think the camera had problems; looks like they weren't on the card when i got back."  i may or may not have shot him but somehow the photos were never syndicated.  ooops.  sorry.

hmm.

go figure.

there's no way i would help promote "his celebrity" because publicists, managers and the talent, if they're nice to him at all, is because they're using him for his pageviews.  i don't know anyone who admits to actually liking him as a person save one person but i beleive they're paid to like him.

i hope he looses his gay audience for being so self-hateful.

and look where that got him ... an 11 minute crying plea to his audience of 26 year old looser-chicks.  how many of them do you think have the same thing going on that kristen bell had going on in that one photo of her?  i'll be the percentage is quite fucking high.

what's funny to me is that someone like him with his new-found money which was built upon a foundation of self-hate and copyright theft ... actually said something to someone -- words can be just as hurtful as a punch -- who did something about it.

okay.  enough.  i'll take my giddy-ass to a movie with j to celebrate.

did you know that wank gets as many pageviews as nikon, by the way?  swear.  not only that but they run in parity sometimes.  crazy.  wank's not happy, today, though.  somehow the state of california is gonna do what north carolina did with internet sales.  whatever.  no sales tax break any more.  good while it lasted.  sites who support their bullshit by affilate percentages are fucked.  that, as it would appear by his pezez-esque manifesto, pisses him off.

seriously, they're almost the same.  one caters to self-esteem-challenged canadian females and the other to old fuckers who jerk off on their gear all day yet find time to search for "tasteful nudes."  of which ... did some amazing dof example work today.  amazing, man.

i'll bet no one that guy supposedly taught photography ... has ever made it ... or even made a decent photo. ;)

i know.

hateful.

whatever.

i'll leave you with allison from antm12.

dunno if i like her more here... perhaps. off to see "away we go."

there's one person who's gonna think i'm a dick for writing this about the fat meanie.  bro, sorry, you know why i don't like him.  he's a thief.  i still like you, though.

hope you're all well.

cheers from the most amazingly temperate l.a. one could ever ask for.

-chris

Comments

[elinor]

Greetings!

[Scott]

My editor and toronto photographer were there when he got punched.. shame tho that since fergie was inside, everyone had to put away their cameras..

I think he deserves it, and I probably wouldn't take a shoot for him, but money talks, and I wish I was in a position to tell him to FO.

[Matt]

I wish he'd said it to Russell Crowe. He would have been romper stompered.

[Dmitry K]

LOL way to go Toronto Police.

Where was he bleeding, I think he needs a better bunch before he can complain. And then he'll at least have something to show for.

And I never heard of this guy till your blogs but he seems like one big ass.

Peace out from the not-helping-perez Toronto.

[Mark Greenmantle]

I'm with Matt on this one, if only he'd said it to Russ, seeing Perez beat down with a PABX phone would have been sweet. He's the scourge of the entertainment scene.

Hope all else is well for you mate, I've been incommunicado due to just keeping up with client needs of late. The net connection at home is dead so I'm only getting online when grabbing coffees and uploading shots to clients now.

[Christian Rollinson]

what a wanker, karma will get him mate ;)

[dan]

Oh wow. I've never heard of the guy, probably because I don't follow celebrities or anything, but damn I just saw that video of him 'describing' the situation and already I loathe him.

[severin]

nice post !
the 24 summilux ... you bastard ! :P

love the comment about lightroom haha.. a few years back it was "i can do that in photoshop too".. now its lightroom, tomorrow its something else... whatever.. there is always one way to do it right and that it with the lens or film not the software.

booking flights to L.A today ;)

cheers sev.

[Ajovah]

As much as ive seen him on TV he has always looked like a douche to me.

And that Winterview with Allison Harvard was great lol.

[Billy]

I never really knew about that Perez Hilton human, if you'd call him that, until I started following your work.

What a waste of fresh air. I'm feeling a wave of empathetic anger welling up inside of me. Me and a mate got harrassed by a homosexual scene kid a couple of years back, for no reason other than to feel good about himself, he stopped once I held him by the collar of his shirt and told him that if he ever said anything rude to us ever again I would break his neck. He was fat and gay aswell, throwing insults to people he didn't know.

I agree, it's never ideal to succumb to violence, but I'm pretty sure if Will.I.Am said "Well you're a straight" in return it wouldn't have effected him, or anything for that matter.